we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize