the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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