They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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