I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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