Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
third nipple confirmed
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
