This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize