Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
