no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
