Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
