Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
