Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
