i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
