I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
