I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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