Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
