i jhust puked up my retainher.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
