if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
