White coat. Heels.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
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when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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