Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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