Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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