yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
