The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
