if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
