chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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