is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
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