i need an iv and a liver transplant
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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