I hate your face
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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