I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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