Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
