the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize