bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize