How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
