tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
