Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
My dick has a subreddit
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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