Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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