Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
