What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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