how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
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There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
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I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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