Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
