i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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