i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
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