They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
