3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
pray to the hookup gods
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize