His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Can I color on your dick again?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
