I was born with a shot glass in my hand
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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