u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I have already put on my inside pants.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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