That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
