three words: i give head
three words: not that well
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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