have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
