Small penises have feelings too.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
