I hate your face
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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